Five Years Old and Not Housebroken!

Friday was my baby sister's fifth birthday. Her real name is Isabel Victoria, but we mostly call her Izzy. She is a Jack Russell Terrier. When people meet her and hear her whole name, they usually say, "That's a big name for such a little dog!" We had a little party for Izzy's birthday. Mommy gave us cookies -- real cookies, not cookies made for dogs -- and we sang Happy Birthday Dear Isabel. Actually, we can't talk so Mommy sang and LuLu (our other sister) and I hummed along.

Izzy is sweet and smart. I really can't say anything else good about her. It isn't even her fault that she doesn't listen and she isn't housebroken. I am sorry to say it, but it is Mommy's fault. When I was four months old, Mommy took me to obedience school. Al, the teacher, showed everybody how to teach their dogs to follow the rules. Mommy practiced with me every day. When Mommy says "sit," I sit. When we are out walking and Mommy says "heel," I walk right next to her left leg. When Mommy says "stay," I know that means don't move. I try to be good, but sometimes I just have too much energy. "Stay" is the hardest command to do. Mommy taught me that I have the biggest bathroom in the world. It is everyplace outside. When I have to go, I sit by the door and bark. Mommy knows what that means and we go right outside. Mommy always praises me for being a good girl!

Now I will tell you about Izzy. She has never gone to school and Mommy never taught her anything. She gets in trouble every single day. If Mommy isn't paying attention to Izzy, Izzy goes all through the house until she finds Mommy's socks or gloves. She runs back and forth until Mommy notices her. Mommy says, "Izzy! Bring it! Bring it right now." Izzy wags her tail and gives Mommy a look that says, "You come get it." Mommy chases Izzy all through the house and finally gets her clothing back -- full of holes.

When Mommy and Izzy go for a walk, Mommy doesn't even bother to say "Heel" because she knows Izzy won't do it. Even though Izzy is small, she is strong and she pulls Mommy all over the place. Izzy pees outside, but that's it. When it is time to go home, Izzy starts picking up pine cones and sticks. Mommy says "Drop it" or "Leave it," but Izzy doesn't listen. They come in the house and you just wouldn't believe your eyes. First Mommy runs to get the vacuum cleaner. That is the only way she can get Izzy to drop the pine cones and sticks. Izzy likes to eat them, but they make her sick. So Mommy turns on the vacuum cleaner and when she gets close to Izzy, Izzy will drop everything. Mommy stoops to clean up the mess, and Izzy runs in and grabs the pine cones while Mommy is picking them up. Mommy gets so angry. After all of that is cleaned up, Izzy poops on the floor! You don't even want to know what my mommy says when she finds it. None of us understands why Izzy stays outside for a long time, and then runs in the house and poops.

Izzy does lots of bad things, but the worst thing Izzy does is she bites me. Hard. She used to do it a lot more, but Mommy used the vacuum cleaner to get Izzy to stop. She is a bully and she thinks she should be first for everything: going outside; getting fed; and, being first at the door when someone comes to the house. I used to get to the door first, but Izzy would get mad and bite me. Now we have a rule for people who are coming to visit. They have to call from the parking lot to give Mommy time to put Izzy in the crate. Izzy can't get to the door at all and she can't bite me from her crate.

Mommy can't train Izzy so she trained all the people who come to our house! On Izzy's birthday, Mommy kept looking at her and she kept saying, "Five years old and not housebroken! I can't believe I have let you live with us for so long." Then she looked at Izzy and said, "It's a good thing you're so cute and sweet. Otherwise you would be living with somebody else." Then she smiles and gives Izzy a big hug and kiss.

Mommy loves all of us. I just wish she had taught Izzy how to be good!